Pages

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Almost As Good As My Next Blog

I didn't use to play video games on a daily basis, or even a weekly basis. In fact, my PS2 was collecting serious dust. What happened? I got a PS3 over the summer and now it's eating up my spare time.
_______

I'm not gonna lie, the state of the economy is finally starting to bum me out. It's all they talk about on the news, and no one really understands it. News channels and Presidential candidates throw out names of banks and businesses, trying to push the blame in different directions, but when it comes down to it, no one can agree on the solution. Why? Because liberals and conservatives can't even agree on how our economy works! They all study the books and earn degrees, but somehow they manage to come out with opposite solutions to every economic problem. Either in economy is completely uncontrollable, or one group is completely wrong.
_______

We're so superficial. I don't even know if we can help it. It's easy, if you try, to judge a person for who they really are, once you get to know them. But uh, how do we choose who we get to know?

Exactly.
_______

I'll admit this: I have a problem asking for help. I just don't like to do it. But recently I've found myself asking for help with a subject I know nothing about. It's a strange feeling, admitting to yourself that you're hopeless without help. I guess anything beats failure...

But we need people. That's really what friends are for. They help each other. It's great to have buddies to do fun things with, but it's more important to have people you can depend on. Friends help without hesitation. They don't expect anything in return for help. If they need help, they know where to go. God forbid you find yourself surrounded by buddies and no friends.
_______

I wrote a lot of blogs entries on MySpace before I decided to stop writing and deleted all of my posts. They were terribly revealing - soul-baring, really. I got scared having so much of myself out there for the world to see. And with the things I wrote, it's understandable. Anyone who read those posts would know things about me I've never told anyone face-to-face. My innermost thoughts, feelings and expressions of... well, everything.

But now. Just now, I wonder if it was a mistake to not just stop writing them, but to delete them. If I could see them again, I would read through them, perhaps edit them and maybe even post some again. Every time I finish a post on my new blog it feels horribly impersonal. I don't feel like this is me. I avoid truly divisive topics. I never write full blogs on a single, important topic. I string off a few observations and post it. That's not me.

Bare with me while I find a balance. I assure you, this blog will be the place to learn about who I am and what I think. I just need to find that balance.


Monday, October 6, 2008

I Don't Sleep, I Just Blink

You know what I've always kind of wanted to do, but haven't? Make music. I don't know why I never picked up an instrument as a child. I just didn't have an interest in playing any. Lessons? No thanks. But music, it's my thing. It's always been pretty much what I care most about. I have ideas, too... I've decided to try my hand at digital music making. Get some crappy free software, first, just to test the water. It seems like the perfect answer.
_______

I have a quiz due by like, 8:30 this morning.
_______

I can't wait to have my own my own home. I don't mind the dorms, but I would just love to have a place to call my own. An apartment could be better, though less convenient, in my case. But I'd rather have my own spot. I guess it'd just make me feel like a man to own my own house, buy some guns...
_______

So, I've been checking out the Baptist Campus Ministries meetings. Pretty cool stuff. It seems like the service is really short, though. And they don't seem to have a regular speaker, week-to-week. For me, that's weird. The music is kinda hard to get into, too. It seems like they try to pick modern songs by well-known artists, so I don't know any of the songs. They just end up feeling awkward. Some songs are written for worship, others are more personal. If the lyrics are too personal, it's hard to relate. I can't be singing lyrics that aren't even true, for me.

But I'm not trying to rip on the BCM. The people are friendly and the teachings are relevant. Plus, it's always difficult for me to get through that awkward period when you don't know anyone. I just have to make sure not to do what I usually do, which is to attach myself to the few people I do know, and not meet others.
_______

You guys are lame. You probably don't read this, but whatever. You guys dropped me like a bad habit. You were like, friggin' next door. You couldn't call? What am I? Whatever. I guess you guys were fun to talk to, while it lasted. I'll probably never see you guys again, but whatever. I guess that's no big deal, to you.
_______

New Todd, you're slippin.
_______

Just about everyone I know steals music, too. And none of them seem to think it's wrong. I hear stuff like, "Why should I buy something I can get for free," "Those rich muthaf-----s don't need my money," "I can't afford to buy music, it's too expensive," or "I buy CDs from the people I really like."

If I even say something like, "Yeah, I'm going Best Buy to get the new _____ CD," I get laughed at. "Why would you buy CDs?!"
_______

I only say "hi," like, one out of every 5 times I want to.
______

I'm pretty sure CHS toilets could flush bricks. I bet the only way to clog a CHS toilet would be to put a CHS toilet in a CHS toilet and try to flush it. I foresee two possibilities. One: the CHS toilet would successfully flush the CHS toilet. Or, two: the encounter could create a paradox, the result of which could cause a chain reaction that would unravel the very fabric of the space-time continuum and destroy the entire universe! Granted that's a worst case scenario. The destruction might in fact be very localized, limited to merely our own galaxy.
_______

I don't feel like spell-checking this one...